Defining your zen-diagram.
It’s a new year and you most likely will consider the idea of kicking an old habit or setting new intentions. Before you jump into setting new goals, I’d encourage you to keep reading to reflect a bit deeper into why you feel the need to re-align yourself.
At the end of the day, I believe we all seek pleasure over pain or simply satisfaction over dissatisfaction. Seems simple enough, but unfortunately humans are emotionally complex and we have a lot of needs to make us feel fulfilled on our life journey. I am sure you are familiar with Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, which is not a small pyramid to climb and its easy to fall down it at any moment. 2020 is all I need to say to make my point.
So, how can we manage our happiness in an ever changing environment? I believe that our ability to be happy more consistently starts with understanding what your core pillars of happiness are.
Core pillars are the main themes that define your own happiness in life. These can be anything from your health, finances, career, or relationships. If you are having a hard time narrowing this down to 4–6 core themes, try this exercise.
Exercise: Write down anything and everything that you need to be happy in your life. This could be as simple as “debt-free” or as specific as “I want to be married with 2 kids by age 35”. After you have written down as much as you can, re-read everything you wrote and cluster items together that seem to fit together. For example, “being debt free” and “buying a house” could be grouped together under a financial theme. After you have clustered items together, label each cluster. These labels reflect your defined core pillars of happiness. You should have 4–6 core pillars.
If you completed the exercise, you might feel overwhelmed by the amount of things you haven’t accomplished yet. So, how can you manage it all and still feel happy? I have been using something I call the zen-diagram. Instead of viewing things as a long, logical staircase to achieving happiness; I have simplified my focus to my daily routine and making sure it reflects my core pillars as much as possible. Let’s try another exercise to give you an idea of what I mean.
Exercise: Write down what your daily routine needs to look like to reflect the core pillars that you defined. Re-read your ideal day and now compare that to your daily routine over the last few days. If you completed the exercise, there most likely is a difference in your desired and actual routine. These differences are where you should focus your attention.
As an example, if “health” is one of your core pillars, then what in your daily routine needs to change to feel good? That might be a combination of more exercise or changing what you eat. Focusing on what you can change in the present moment will give you more consistent happiness. Use the zen-diagram as a tool for keeping your core pillars in focus and in balance of each other overtime.
Thanks for reading! I hope you found this article helpful as you reflect on yourself and the year ahead. Have other thoughts or questions? Leave a comment.
